Okay, so we decided to tackle fudge. I LOVE fudge, love it! Brett’s mom made fudge every year for Christmas, so we thought it appropriate, and also fun, because there’s loads of learning to do and we got to buy a new gadget. (you need a good candy thermometer to make candy, don’t even try to get cheap about this one, get the candy thermometer at this place, because it rocks)
First, let’s talk about the stages of candy cooking. For this information, we consulted our Guru, as well as the mostly out-dated “The Joy of Cooking.” (I say outdated, because the book continually refers to housewives, as if housewives are the only ones doing the cooking, and many of us are neither houses nor wives).
Candy Stages:
Stage 1: thread at 215 degrees and if dumped in water it makes a brittle thread that can be stretched with the fingers (????)
Stage 2: Soft Ball at 234 to 242 degrees and if dumped in water it makes a limp, sticky ball that flattens when removed from the water (fudge)
Stage 3: Hard Ball at 250 to 266 degrees and if dumped in water it makes a hard ball that holds its shape when removed from the water but is still pliable (caramel)
Stage 4: Soft Crack at 270 to 290 degrees and if dumped in water it makes firm strands that can be stretched or bent when removed from the water (toffee)
Stage 5: Hard Crack at 300 to 310 degrees and if dumped in water it makes stiff, firm threads that break easily when removed from the water (lollipops)
So all of this staging is due to crystallization, which is what makes fudge and all candies so damn difficult (and also so much fun!) Luckily, there are ways to slow down this crystallization, and these ways also make for tasty treats. You just have to add some stuff that will keep the sugar from crystallizing, like butter, chocolate and milk.
Here's a blow by blow of the Joy of Cooking "Chocolate Cockaigne" (no idea why they call it that) recipe.
What you'll need:
1 cup minus 1 tablespoon half and half
2 cups sugar
1/8 teaspoon salt
2 oz. grated unsweetened chocolate
2 to 4 tablespoons butter
1 teaspoon vanilla
1/2 to 1 cup broken nutmeats
What you do:
Place some half and half in a pot and bring it to a boil
Then you add the chocolate, sugar and salt, and let it all melt
Bring this tasty looking liquid to a boil at medium high heat. Once boiling, reduce to medium heat, and cover for 3 minutes. You have to cover it because the steam will clean the sides of any potential crystals, because we don't want any crystals yet.
Now you should put your candy thermometer in your delicious chocolaty goodness, and set it for "soft ball" stage, or 234 degrees
And then you wait . . . . But while you wait, you can prepare your dish. If you're playing along at home, please get yourself an 8X8 glass baking dish. We don't have such a thing, so I used this weird 9X6 baking dish that I think maybe came from Ikea and was maybe called Ulldeenplatz or something
Anyway, butter your dish and then put some parchment paper in it.
Once your candy thermometer tells you you've reached 234 degrees, remove from heat, and let cool down to 110 degrees but DO NOT TOUCH, JOSTLE, SNEEZE ON, OR OTHERWISE CONTAMINATE YOUR FUDGE. If you disturb the fudge, it will become very very grainy because you will make BIG crystals that you don't want. However, now is the time to add your butter, in cute little pats, just on the surface of the fudge. You may watch it melt, because that's kind of mesmerizing, but DO NOT breathe on the fudge for it is very sensitive
Once the thermometer dips to 110 (which takes approximately a lifetime) you should add the vanilla and the nuts, and stir as though you were in some sort of bizarre stirring contest wherein speed mattered. Basically, you just need to stir like a crazy person. Why stir like a crazy person? Because now you want those crystals, oh yes, you want lots of tiny crystals so that your fudge will be nice and smooth and the more stirring you do, the more little crystals you shall have. You have to stir until the fudge looses its sheen and starts to dull, or your arm falls off, which ever happens first.
Then you spread it in your prepared pan with a silicone spatula. Did I mention you should be using a wooden spoon for everything else? Well, you should.
So then you let it cool on the counter (do NOT put in fridge) for about 2 hours. It's a painful 2 hours, because the smell of chocolate will try to kill you. But, creamy, fudgey goodness will be your reward.
Until next time. Over and out.
7 comments:
This post is so THOROUGH. I mean, I'll never make fudge because a) it's not Weight Watchers-friendly and b) just the thought of cleaning the chocolate off the pans makes me want to die. But I still read the whole thing AND enjoyed it. You guys are seriously talented, is my point.
Wait, it worked and nothing was fucked up/set on fire? BOO! LAME!
Fudge scares me but I'm much more likely to try it now that I have pictures.
I feel like I just saw a Good Eats where AB explained the candy stages or whatev. Probably because I TiVo each and every episode, every time it comes on.
Jess, that's nice of you to say, but the fudge was actually my second attempt becuase the first one failed.
Tessie, you did just see Alton do fudge and explain all this stuff. We kept rewinding that episode to watch him do thing, but it turned out that his recipe kind of didn't turn out for us, so we went for the Joy of Cooking recipe.
The next installment will be less lame because Brett is in charge of it.
fudge batch 3 presently cooling. Current temp: 116.2F. I haven't much time to comment.
This post is not lame flib. Though you could have self depricated a bit more, or at least chastized me. I suggested using the large stock pot for the batch pictured. It is WAY too big for fudge making. The bottom cooled to fast and made a solid film of fudge. That was the biggest fuck up so far.
The first batch using the Alton brown recipe was too chocolately, it used twice as much unsweetened chocolate, and we stirred it too soon, making it grainy. And we roasted the nuts, which gave it more of a roasted flavor, almost burnt. It turns out we don't like the nuts roasted.
Temp now at 112.5F.
As the temp lowers it slows in rate of drop. I still have time.
Ok, so I spent the time checking for errors, and now we are at 110.4, and I have not completed editing, so things may not make sense in this comment. Must stir. Bye.
Fun fudge fact:
Supposedly, fudge was invented when a Vasser college student "fudged" a batch of carmels, hence the name. One version of the rumor states it happened February 14, 1886.
Another version of the story is that aliens bequeathed the recipe upon the college student who was a bio-chemistry major trying to find a cure for depression. I just made up that rumor right now, but we'll see where the rumor takes itself. Maybe the world can benefit from my fudged fudge fact.
I fear all cooking, especially something as complicated as fudge, but you make it seem so accessible and SIMPLE. Alas, I don't have the balls to try - but I will continue reading and immensely enjoying your experiments.
While I did enjoy the explanation very much, I think I'll have to wait until my children are older to try it - it is a little too fussy and there is just too much opportunity for error. I tend to get excessively frustrated when something doesn't work out for me the first time.
For my fudge recipe you just melt a bunch of butter, cream, sugar and chocolate in the microwave, then stir in Fluff, nuts and vanilla. Not a candy thermometer in sight (and probably not even real fudge), but still yummy!
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